Ok so I wrote this last night but spaced posting it😞.
So I thought a little background might make for some better reading.
I am 27 years old. I have been married almost seven years to the most amazing and gorgeous man in the world. I have three amazing kids that I love like crazy. I spend my days attempting to keep up with them and caring for our house and land. I LOVE my life and consider it a precious gift.
When I was pregnant with my three little babies I had preeclampsia each time. It is a life threatening disease for both mom and baby and the only cure is to give birth, whether the baby is mature enough or not. So all of my babies were premies, with the youngest coming a whopping 11 weeks early. I am so very pleased and beyond grateful to report that all three are perfectly healthy and growing and developing just as they should👊👏🙌!!!!
I, however, was left with high blood pressure and some minor depression/ anxiety. You see, I had to face the mortality of my littlest one on two occasions. While I know that I am beyond blessed to still hold him and tuck him in bed every night, and I know some parents were robbed of that privilege, it left a mark on me mentally.
I take a tiny pill everyday to manage the blood pressure. For the depression I took one minor medication for about 10 months and it did wonders for me. I no longer have nightmares or dwell in the past. In fact, my new dream is to become a NICU nurse and give back to the life that so beautifully gave me my life. The only downside to the medication made me gain weight.
I have struggled with my weight and body image since 3rd grade, way way way too young! When I met my husband he loved me for me and told me I was beautiful everyday. I believed him and it made a huge difference in my life. I actually dropped almost forty pounds while we were dating. I was not obese when we met. I was 165 lbs and a size 10. The day we married is was 127 lbs and a size 4. I didn't really diet or even exercise. I just focused on the important things, not food, and I stayed active.
Fast forward seven years, and three kids. I was fortunate not to gain tons of weight during my pregnancies, though I gained a fair amount. The stress of being a NICU mom, breastfeeding, and bringing home and caring for a premie baby helped me to be a size six after baby three. Then I went on antidepressants.
You know that on weight you have in mind to never go over. It's like, just shoot me if I ever hit this number again. Well mine is relatively low, not unhealthy, just closer to my target weight than most. Well at the end of my baby's fist year I was eleven pounds under that weight, and only eight away from my target. Cue antidepressants. I gained 14 pounds. You do the math. Yes, that puts me three pounds over my "kill me now" weight.
I am trying to keep a good perspective. I am still wearing most of my size six clothes. My husband is still crazy attracted to me. And I know there are those out there that are saying " oh, poor baby! I have one hundred pounds to lose!" I get it, and I think you are beautiful!!!! I see beauty in everyone, including myself.
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I have beautiful blue eyes, great dimples, great curves (I think women look great with curves) and pretty killer natural boobs. Now name five great things about your appearance. All women have at least five, and it will s imperative that you know them!
I know it is not about being skinny or tiny. Being a woman is incredibly sexy in and of itself. But, for me, it is about a lifetime of healthy. I want to be a healthy wife, mother, grandmother, and even great grandmother. I want my posterity to know me as a healthy active woman who can keep up will all my walks of life.
Also I want my daughter to see me as a healthy, and confident woman who doesn't obsess over weight and appearance but who takes care of herself. So that is where I am at. That is my background, and my reasons for starting this blog and journey.
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